God Help Me.....I'm hormonal!

Just as I got done posting the last post, Hali got a phone call from one of her friends. She is invited to a Halloween party on Halloween for pizza, trick or treating, movies, a sleepover and what have you. I got tears in my eyes....(ok, still do) after realizing I will not be taking her trick or treating! In past years we have always gone with some friends but I was with. She is growing up and I will miss my baby this year. There you have it. Within less than ten minutes time I am blogging how I can't handle her and now how I can't let her go!!! I am seriously losing my emotional balance here!

Here are some pictures I took this afternoon (before the breakdown).

I don't know how to do this!!!!!!

Ok, so I have been having discipline issues with Hali lately. Things are pretty nice and quiet until I pick her up from school. Once she walks in the door or even on the ride home all S&*$ hits the fan. I don't know if she saves it all day for me or what but she starts in on Leiton. I don't even know what happens but before I know it hair is being pulled, punches are being taken and someone is seriously crying! Before I know who to punish they start again blaming and whining and then hitting and then I lose it. Once things calm down a little we start homework or they play games or just chill in their rooms. TOday however I had to take the trampoline down for the winter. I can' even say what happened...it just excilated to a point where Leiton was whipped on the ground and hit his head. I told Hali to go inside and I thought she did. No. I tell her again she says no. I count to 3, threaten to take items away and all of this goes on until I absolutely lose it with her. Our next door neighbors are outside by the way who we don't get along with and Leiton is crying. I scream at Hali (we are in the garage now) to get her butt inside. I chase her in and with her boots on full of mud she runs to her room and slams the door. I push my way in and she now has mud ALL over the carpets! I really thought I had lost my mind I was so mad at her. Now I haven't talked to her for over an hour and I am still mad. Yesterday she kicked a hole in Leiton's bedroom door because he pulled her hair. What is going on ???? I can't do this anymore. I need this to get better!! I am becoming wicked!!! Leiton of course is the first to come to me and hug me and say "I love you mommy and so does God". What a sweet boy. How can I get that out of my 7 year old daughter??? I need to find an older child Baby Book. I wonder if Dr. Sears has wrote one of those. I may have to check.........

bored.

OK, so with only one more day of school vacation I have to shamefully say we have done absolutely nothing. I noticed this look on Leiton's face today that I have never noticed before. I asked him what was wrong and he answered.."I'm bored". Now this kid usually can have a blast with a brick for days on end however this week without anything planned for the kids I let them just have a lazy time. I was shocked that he could get bored! It must be that he is getting older or that he is used to having more of a structured day. Or maybe it's the fact that we don't live next door to their best friends anymore and can't just go outside and have kids join him instantly anymore. I feel tremendously guilty that I let him feel this way. I have been unbelievably tired and just not feeling good so I have been a bit boring I suppose. Hali has made about 2 thousand pictures of art. That girl can do art for hours and hours. We did go to the library this afternoon which was good. I think tomorrow I will make an effort for us to spend the entire day outside the house. I definately need to get out and I am desperate to see excitement in Leiton's eyes again before vacation is over. One funny thing he said was"Mom,,when is vacation going to start? and is there a bathroom at vacation?" I feel so terrible disappointing him on what vacation is...I have a feeling when the next vacation comes he won't be as excited. I really need to plan a real vacation for us soon.

Tina's having a girl!

We found out today that my sister is going to have a girl! She's not going to share what the name is going to be until after it is born. I don't know how people can do that!! As soon as I have a name picked out I have to share it with EVERYONE!! I know alot of people make faces indicating their true feelings of the name or say they know someone who has that name and is ugly or something like that but that doesn't bother me. In fact I want to know what people think before hand. I have always been someone who doesn't like what everyone else likes and in fact if everyone LOVES a name I tend not to. Hali was a name I had picked out since 8th grade when I first met a Hali in junior high. To my would-be-husbands I held out that my daughter's name was going to be Hali and it came true. Leiton was a name I had to work on. I was going for Aiden and I was working in an office with all women at the time. Everyone had an opinion. I even emailed my friend Gretchen several times a day of names I found on Babynames.com. She is always short in her opinions which I appreciate. Finally after watching tennis and having Steve point out the name Lleyton (Hewitt) I was hooked. Then came the spelling. Most people didn't like the name or didn't have an opinion. I looked up the "correct spelling" which was Leighton and mixed it up a bit and got Leiton! Now no one can pronounce it right when it is read. Hali's either but what the hey. I'm putting it out there now if I have a girl it is going to be Piper. I met a mom who had the cutest girl at gymnastics and when she told me her name I had to ask twice. It really grew on me and now no matter how many funny faces I get that is my name. It's the child that makes the name anyway and I think I make pretty cool kids. : ) If I have a boy however I'm struggling for a name. All my old ideas come up short now. We'll see.....