This is a long one.......

I want to share something that I am really kicking myself about. I have always been very careful to make sure my kids "feel right" about themselves. Sometimes that means manipulating a situation to get them to do what they are supposed to do. I mainly use this for different activities that my kids take part of. With Hali it started with gymnastics. She is generally referred to as a "shy" girl however I have never told her she is shy. When other people comment on her being shy I reassure her and them that she is a thinker or reserved. If you do know her she definately warms up with time and is anything but shy. So when it came time for her to begin gymnastics without a parent I did everything possible for her to feel comfortable being part of a big group. This may sound like coddleing (SP)? but for her it worked and she now loves it. Same thing happened with Soccer. When she started that she was very reserved and tended to just stand there and watch her teammates play. Her first game she cried and did not want to go in. I let her sit and watch for a while but slowly urged her to try and play. It worked and now she loves soccer and takes charge on the field. My problem has recently been with Leiton. He has always been the one to run out to gymnastics without saying goodbye, or to school and playdates. This year however he has been having issues. His first couple soccer practices he went right out there and played awesome. His first game he went in and got hit in the gut with the ball. He cried and refused to go back in the game. I did let him watch for a bit and urged him to get back in there but he flipped out! Just last night was parents day for his boys gymnastics class. Granted there were ALOT of parents and grandparents there for the class prior there are only a few boys in his class so there weren't many people watching his class. He first disappeared behind the Coke machine. I could not get him up and he refused to go. He normally begs to go to gymnastics everyday, or did anyway. I went out and sat with Hali watching thinking he would follow. After ten minutes he did not show. I went out and tried to pick him up and carry him. He went limp and would not stand up. I started thinking about all the money I had spent and had already signed him up for next session. I told him he is going to go in there right now! I said he will not quit. I was getting way too mad. I hurt his arm while trying to pick him up and he started crying more loudly. I went back in the gym to get Hali. Hali then went out to try and get him with no luck. Finally I told him he needs to watch his class at least where he went upstairs to watch from the balcony. He was crying hysterically because I don't believe he has every seen me so mad at him before. After sitting on the floor watching the other boys for a while I said this is ridiculous and Hali and I left to go sit in the lobby. Leiton saw us leave and thought we left him. He ran right past us in shorts and a T with no socks or shoes and ran right outside yelling "MOM!!!!". I ran out to get him and he was hyperventilating. I have never felt so badly for how I handled a situation before in my life. I just don't know how to handle this change in him. I cried just as hard as him when I saw the fear in his eyes. I could not hug him enough. Maybe boys do need a more forceful way to participate in things but this had never been an issue before as he was always so social. Steve doesn't think I need to force anything on him or make him do anything but I really don't agree. (that is a totally different blog entirely) How do I handle this as I feel I cannot give up on him and the things he truly enjoys and is good at. I know it is a fear of the other boys being rough and maybe not as inclusive of him. Does anyone else have this problem? I am completely at a loss here and my self esteem as a parent to him is zilch! He is so quick to forgive me. I need to help him.

A trip to the tire store.

Here's a funny story:

It was a Friday afternoon, I had picked the kids up from school and also our former neighbor's kids as well. I needed to get new tires put on my van so I took the whole group to Mills Fleet Farm. While the van was getting worked on we went and looked at toys which killed a good half an hour however when we got back to the tire store they were not done. I sat down and started reading a magazine. The kids sat and got up and were looking through the window at the workers. Then after a couple minutes of them being too quiet I started paying attention. They were all standing outside the bathroom door looking up at the sign. They were sounding out a word. un--- unnnnnnyyyy sex. That's right they were reading the word UNISEX on the door however they were pronouncing it all wrong...UNsex..."mom!!!! what is in this room!!!????" Their innocent little selves saying the word sex with questioning blank stares made it just too funny not to share. Thank goodness the tires were done before they started asking more questions!

I have heard my share of Who!

Is it possible to watch Horton Hears a Who too much???? Leiton has been laid up on the sofa this afternoon after suffering a migraine and has watched this movie 3 times and is currently on his fourth viewing. Cute movie but my my my...

Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! We had a great one. We went to my parent's house in Battle Lake. We had extended family there which included my two aunts and uncle, my cousins and their 4 kids. It reminded me of holidays when I was a kid and the house was packed. The food was way too good and I hurt after eating it all. All the kids,.....yes I am still included I guess, played apples to apples which was a hoot. My aunt then got out my grandpa's old slide projector and we looked at slides of long, long ago. There were many baby pictures of me as well as others. We used to look at slides every Thanksgiving and Christmas when I was a kid and we all packed into my grandpa's kitchen. It was so fun. Leiton thought it was pretty cool. After turkey sandwiches everyone packed up and went on their way. We probably won't see everyone again for another year or two so it was kind of sad. Steve and I left the kids for the night as my parents were going to take the kids to Cupkie Village to cut down a tree and have some fun. Hali's birthday is today. She is 8!!! I talked to her a bit and I really miss her today. I got a call that Leiton was having one of his migraines this evening so hopefully he will be able to sleep it off and wake up ok. I can't wait to see my babies tomorrow and celebrate Hali's birthday at home!

The first of many pictures to come....

I am now finally posting a picture of our soon to be baby number 3. As far as other happenings in our lives, things have been pretty quiet. Leiton had two fillings done today. I was rather impressed with how well he handled it. He was kind of excited and thinks the numbness thing is pretty cool! I told him that may be but he is still brushing his teeth at least 10 times a day now!

Cozy day

This morning was the first morning in a long while that was slow and easy going. The kids had managed their way up sometime during the night and we were all snuggling together and watching cartoons in bed. Steve found himself a new bed in Leiton's room. We woke slowly and then we had breakfast. It was the kind of morning I had been waiting for for a while. I had no where I needed to go but I could look out the window at the cold cold outside. I had to open the door to experience the cold so I could appreciate the coziness inside. I made coffee with pumpkin spice cream....MMMMmmm. I started cleaning which Hali noted I always seem to do when it snows. I now have a clean house with almost no dirty laundry. I caught Leiton playing on the computer. He turned around and just says "Mom, I am happy!" What more could a mother ask for. Today I have heard 2 " I love yous" from him. Hali decided to play outside...another blessing....(she has been a handful lately). Leiton just went out to find her now too. I really am looking forward to this weather and Christmas time. I put up some lights on a fake tree in the living room and already feel festive. As soon as I am done here I am going to make chicken and gravy with stuffing and mashed potatoes......I have been craving that forever! So I will end this with a Thank you to the God who makes these good days and for allowing me to learn to recognize them when I am still in the moment.

Halloween....finally

Here are some pics of the days leading up to Halloween and the big day itself. I am so glad it is over. I only wish I hadn't bought so much candy! We had minimal trick or treaters. The group Leiton and I got caught up in had 20 plus kids!!! Hali went with her friends from school and had her first sleep over. She had a blast but was so so tired the next day. Leiton now has maybe 5 pieces of candy left from a huge pumpkin full. The sooner we can get rid of it the better.....