First day of school

I have an empty feeling today. The normal day is no longer. This day will become the new normal. I'm sure I will enjoy it soon. Today though, I feel empty and worry and longing to see my kids. I don't konw that I am the example to set for them. I was constantly going over and over the plan for the morning and after school. I forgot Leiton's jacket and had to return with it. I walked Hali to her locker, but not to her classroom. Was that right? I worry that she came upon a problem that if I had been there wouldn't have been. Leiton played brave, though I knew underneath he was about to lose his tears. I am so proud how he found his locker and went right to his class and desk without looking behind. I worry they can find each other after school so they can get on the bus for the first time ever. I worry that they know when to get off. I worry about how they are going to react when they get home about their day. Will they be excited or will they let all steam blow that they have been holding in all day. I pray. I take the advise I gave to Hali last night and give my worries to God.

Taking a break.

I am taking a break from taking a break from blogging. Recently my beloved Blackberry decided it wasn't going to work anymore. I never thought I would be one of those people who could not get by without a cell phone...I hate talking on the phone, but I love checking emails and facebook and what have you at any time. My warranty of course is up and I'm not due for an upgrade until November. I am searching for a Verizon phone now on my computer. I hate being on the computer. It seems as if the minute I get on I get SO mad and frustrated because it is slow and everyone needs me and I end up not getting anything accomplished except for making kids and myself cry. I have been making a list in my head of all the places I need to go online and once I finally get a few quiet moments and the computer is working I can't think of one darn thing. Oh, I just remembered one now....I need to do my pictures I tried to download. I'll have to write that one down. Ok, what I just wrote wasn't what I started out wanting to blog about here and now for the life of me I can't remember what I was going to blog about. Isn't it fun getting inside my head? Now you know why I always appear oh, what's the word....CONFUSED all the time.

I really wish.....

I was good at telling stories. I have so many things to write about however when I write it comes out nothing like I experienced it. I wish I would have paid attention in English class.

Here's an update of our July. We spent the beginning of the month at the lake. Tina was in town for our cousin's wedding and we spent the 4th of July together at the lake. The following week Steve had the week off so we brought him with. This was his first time at this property. He's not much of an outdoor guy and he did admit he had withdrawals from no internet or cable TV. Leiton had so much fun getting him out on the dock fishing however we were not able to convince him to get in the lake and swim with us. I am such an outdoor person I really can't understand indoor people at all! As we headed back home we hit a deer not more than5 minutes into our drive. How traumatic is that! I cried so hard. Our front end was totaled. We are still waiting as far as whether the insurance company will let us fix it as they wanted to total it. Fine, if it was worth anything but even though that is our "new" car it's not worth much. Anyway, when we got home we pretty much all got sick. Leiton had pink eye in both eyes, sore throat. I have had a sore throat since with a terrible cough. We have been to the Dr. twice now and we don't have strep but Leiton does have double ear infections.
So, here I am, wishing I could have July back. July has got to be the fastest month. Does August even count as a summer month anymore? The sun isn't as strong, back to school is everywhere, I just feel the doom of Fall coming. I love Fall but not when I'm not ready for it. Hopefully I can feel better soon so I can get outside and not waste my Summer away anymore.

I have not looked at my blog for so long I forgot my password!! I have been busy decorating my house. I have been wanting to add items for so long and all I have left to do is some painting of furniture and of Hali's room. It takes all of my focus when I get an idea to change something or add something and I tend to neglect everything else. On top of that I also got my new camera yesterday!! It is no where close to being an actual NEW camera but it is new to me. I bought it on eBay and I am so so excited to figure out how to use it. It is an EOS D6o DSLR camera. Already I love the pictures I have taken in automatic mode only. I have been DYING to learn how to take photos with blurry backgrounds you have no idea. I have found that I have alot of reading to do and research to know how to do any editing. I find myself here at my blog again after realizing I know nothing about RAW images and that I cannot edit them???? I have to take a break anyway as Boden just woke up. I hope to be able to blog some of my new pictures soon!

Something to make you smile...

Hali was practicing handstands against the wall and every time I would tell her to kick Boden would laugh so hard!

Sorry about the neck pain trying to watch this. :(

To continue...

on my previous post. I feel this will be the new trend for my blogging. I can find no other way to make my ramblings make any sense than to just add on to what I was trying to say before. I love my distractions and I am so thankful for them. For sanity reasons I need to sleep when they sleep. Boden is 10 months old now but since I need my full 8 hours of sleep to just be nice I need to just do it that way. SO, taking time to do things after bedtime is out right now. Right now Hali and Leiton are at the park skating with Steve. Following that they are going to pick up some groceries and bring home dinner. What more can I ask for in a Sunday afternoon? Boden is getting angry at me for plopping him in his exersauser so I better make this quick. What I have realized about my photography learning is basically I need a new camera. I have a Kodak EasyShare c330 which was given to me as a Christmas gift about 5 years ago. After some reading on the internet I realize I need a SLR camera. I do not want to invest that kind of money since I am just learning from ground zero. I am wondering, should I start with a SLR camera that uses film since they are SO much cheaper on Ebay or should I just start with a newer digital camera with greater megapixels? Also, what kind of photoediting programs do people use? I have been using Picasa. I don't want to spend any money. If I start using a manual focusing camera lens do I really need photo editing that much? I want to achieve the look of an in-focus subject with a blurry background. I know, so many questions!! That's just a part of all that is going on in my head! ha ha.....kind of.

I have been....

Trying to figure out photography and photo editing.....all while trying to take care of a baby, 2 kids and their homework, fighting, what have you, cleaning house, cooking meals, doing laundry listening to LOUDness! all while answering the question am I done yet! I find it impossible to keep up with my blog and things that interest me such as photography or just reading a book. As I type this I have yelled "what was that??? what happened???" way too many times for me to feel like I am justified to be blogging right now. How do people do it???